A Rant on Cheap Shoes

Well, dear readers, I have a confession to make about my footwear. Most of my shoes were bought at Payless* some time between 2003 and 2006.

Payless was my go-to for cute black flats, mary janes, and boots in my early 20s.

The pair of black boots I bought there, in particular, have been my favorite pair of shoes for years. I think I paid no more than $23.99 for them in 2003. They went perfectly with all my skirts and dresses. Their chunky platform heels made my legs look sexy, and were incredibly comfortable to drum in. I think I wore them to about 90% of Jolenes shows.

Here I am in San Francisco in 2003, wearing my beloved boots, jumping on a hotel bed with my bandmate Jake before rocking out at the Hemlock Tavern.

These boots are totally thrashed and unwearable now, after constant wearage for so many years. I was devastated when I recently found holes in them. I was hoping Payless would be able to provide a replacement pair on the cheap, but I was saddened when I went there recently and found that my tastes in footwear are totally not up to speed with recent trends in cheap shoes.

• What’s up with all these slouchy boots? I want my legs to look slender! Slouchy boots just make me look like I have thick calves.

• Where are all the knee-high boots? I don’t want booties. I don’t want mid-calf boots. I want something I can zip all the way up to my knee, please!

• What happened to the chunky platform heel? They are comfy and easy to walk in. I take the train to school, and so I end up walking a lot each day. I’m not one of those people who can walk all over the place in high, stiletto heels. My feet will fall off, I swear!

• Since when are boots at freaking Payless over fifty dollars?! Okay, I do realize that when I bought my last pair of boots from Payless it was 2003. Yes, I know that was seven years ago. But, c’mon! The only pair of boots I saw at Payless that  might work are $59.99. What?! Please don’t tell me I’ve become that old person who says things like, “When I was 21, I could get good, cute boots for less than twenty-five dollars!” Is this what’s happening? Say it isn’t so!

So I’m not sure what I’m going to do. I’ve been looking on eBay, but like I said, my tastes aren’t up to par with what’s trendy right now. Most of the boots on eBay are some sort of combo of slouchy, stiletto-heeled, and/or mid-calfed.

But I’m holding out hope! Something I like has gotta turn up in my budget right?

* Remember when Payless used to be Volume Shoe Source in the ’80s?